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Grown Up

by Que Fuerte

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1.
Stay Home 04:31
Get off the subway at 5am, walking home Still haven't gotten used to going to bed alone Took your photo off my bedside table I never thought that I'd be able to I had a dream that you came home the other night We started making up but nothing about it felt right So just forget it Just forget it And I just want you to know I think about where I would go if I cared about anyone else Half as much as I care about me Got too fucked up, wanted to call you the other night I tried to find the words but nothing I thought of felt right So just forget it Just forget it And I just want you to know I think about the ways I show that I care about people around me And how it's never enough
2.
Do you ever find You feel like you've crossed a line? You really fuck me up sometimes But I'm Feeling Fine Have I told you I'm not sorry anymore For the things that I say For the things that I do It's all a process and I'm still learning And maybe someday I'll feel good enough That I won't just sit alone in my room Wondering how young I could die And how I'll never be the person I wanna be Don't you tell me that I'm living in my own world I know I seem distant, but self preservation is the only thing that's keeping my head above water And I take no pride in knowing that you're falling apart while I'm feeling better Have I told you I'm not sorry anymore For the things that I say For the things that I do It's all a process and I'm still learning And maybe someday I'll feel good enough That I won't just sit alone in my room Wondering how I could've changed To be the person you want me to be It always starts with the best of intentions And ends with someone saying something they can't take back I wanna pick up when you call But when I hear your voice, I can't help but think of how The past few years taught me to take care of myself I don't need anybody else I don't need anybody else I don't need
3.
Grown Up 03:34
For the first time in my life I feel Like I'm not falling apart Like I'm not falling apart I'm eating less, I get no sleep But I'm not falling apart Things were ok from the start I wonder if me as a teenager would be proud of me now Now that I'm older, nothing's changed, but things feel different somehow But things are getting better I can hold myself together Maybe I just need to take some time to get my thoughts together Maybe I'll feel better You say you miss all your old friends And I don't wanna know No I don't wanna know You say you're fine I know it hurts No one would ever know No you don't let it show You were really so far gone, you really thought you knew yourself so well You know I'd never hate you, I just wish you didn't hate yourself But things are getting better Can't be this bad forever
4.
One Bedroom 03:37
I don't even know how to talk to you I won't just tell you that it's all ok I know that it never helps I just wish that you would face anything Your problems follow when you run away You can try but you can't hide yourself from it all The further you go the further you fall You always say that you don't need anyone at all You always say that you don't need anyone at all You always say that I try to tell you I try to tell you I try to tell you that you're not alone But whenever you call I don't pick up the phone Maybe meet me when you're done with school And we can talk about what you wanna do I try to tell you I try to tell you I try to tell you that you're not alone But you always tell me I'd never know Maybe meet me when you're done with school And we can talk about what you wanna do
5.
What's Left 04:04
I've been wakin up In a cold sweat I swear I'm fine I just need rest I tell myself that I shouldn't feel so bad about myself I keep thinkin bout how long I've been Dwellin on the past, like it's not too late to change But it's so hard moving forward When you're weighed down by the feeling you're to blame I know it's not ok I think it's time to start all over again I’m telling you that I try Always but I forgot Every word you said I’m sure it meant a lot If we don’t know where we’re going next How can we really say If it’s all that bad Or if we just don’t feel safe So I tell you once again That maybe I’m better off now Than I was back then Maybe all the fights we have Wouldn’t seem so bad If we had anything to say I tell myself again that We don’t really know What we could possibly do Where we could possibly go I know you’ve got enough to worry about Before you think about me There’s so much more of this world That you still need to see I'm telling you You'll never know just what you mean to me And you never could as far as I can see If we don't know where we're going next how could we ever say If it could ever last or if it fades away So I tell you once again That maybe you'd better get for away from me as you can I'm sorry that I can't be what everybody needs from me

credits

released August 18, 2017

All songs performed by Que Fuerte:
Baxter Barber-Vox/guitar
Alejandro Ortiz-Better guitar
Quentin Perez-Bass
Bobby Brooks-Drums

Drums engineered by Eric Oulundsen at Red6 Productions.
Everything else engineered, mixed, and mastered by Jonathan Pereira.

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Que Fuerte New York, New York

Bax JJ Q n' Bob

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