1. |
Stay Home
04:31
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Get off the subway at 5am, walking home
Still haven't gotten used to going to bed alone
Took your photo off my bedside table
I never thought that I'd be able to
I had a dream that you came home the other night
We started making up but nothing about it felt right
So just forget it
Just forget it
And I just want you to know
I think about where I would go if I cared about anyone else
Half as much as I care about me
Got too fucked up, wanted to call you the other night
I tried to find the words but nothing I thought of felt right
So just forget it
Just forget it
And I just want you to know
I think about the ways I show that I care about people around me
And how it's never enough
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2. |
Boys Just Wanna Have Fun
03:38
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Do you ever find
You feel like you've crossed a line?
You really fuck me up sometimes
But I'm Feeling Fine
Have I told you
I'm not sorry anymore
For the things that I say
For the things that I do
It's all a process and I'm still learning
And maybe someday I'll feel good enough
That I won't just sit alone in my room
Wondering how young I could die
And how I'll never be the person I wanna be
Don't you tell me that I'm living in my own world
I know I seem distant, but self preservation is the only thing that's keeping my head above water
And I take no pride in knowing that you're falling apart while I'm feeling better
Have I told you
I'm not sorry anymore
For the things that I say
For the things that I do
It's all a process and I'm still learning
And maybe someday I'll feel good enough
That I won't just sit alone in my room
Wondering how I could've changed
To be the person you want me to be
It always starts with the best of intentions
And ends with someone saying something they can't take back
I wanna pick up when you call
But when I hear your voice, I can't help but think of how
The past few years taught me to take care of myself
I don't need anybody else
I don't need anybody else
I don't need
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3. |
Grown Up
03:34
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For the first time in my life I feel
Like I'm not falling apart
Like I'm not falling apart
I'm eating less, I get no sleep
But I'm not falling apart
Things were ok from the start
I wonder if me as a teenager would be proud of me now
Now that I'm older, nothing's changed, but things feel different somehow
But things are getting better
I can hold myself together
Maybe I just need to take some time to get my thoughts together
Maybe I'll feel better
You say you miss all your old friends
And I don't wanna know
No I don't wanna know
You say you're fine I know it hurts
No one would ever know
No you don't let it show
You were really so far gone, you really thought you knew yourself so well
You know I'd never hate you, I just wish you didn't hate yourself
But things are getting better
Can't be this bad forever
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4. |
One Bedroom
03:37
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I don't even know how to talk to you
I won't just tell you that it's all ok
I know that it never helps
I just wish that you would face anything
Your problems follow when you run away
You can try but you can't hide yourself from it all
The further you go the further you fall
You always say that you don't need anyone at all
You always say that you don't need anyone at all
You always say that
I try to tell you
I try to tell you
I try to tell you that you're not alone
But whenever you call I don't pick up the phone
Maybe meet me when you're done with school
And we can talk about what you wanna do
I try to tell you
I try to tell you
I try to tell you that you're not alone
But you always tell me I'd never know
Maybe meet me when you're done with school
And we can talk about what you wanna do
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5. |
What's Left
04:04
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I've been wakin up
In a cold sweat
I swear I'm fine
I just need rest
I tell myself that I shouldn't feel so bad about myself
I keep thinkin bout how long I've been
Dwellin on the past, like it's not too late to change
But it's so hard moving forward
When you're weighed down by the feeling you're to blame
I know it's not ok
I think it's time to start all over again
I’m telling you that I try
Always but I forgot
Every word you said
I’m sure it meant a lot
If we don’t know where we’re going next
How can we really say
If it’s all that bad
Or if we just don’t feel safe
So I tell you once again
That maybe I’m better off now
Than I was back then
Maybe all the fights we have
Wouldn’t seem so bad
If we had anything to say
I tell myself again that
We don’t really know
What we could possibly do
Where we could possibly go
I know you’ve got enough to worry about
Before you think about me
There’s so much more of this world
That you still need to see
I'm telling you
You'll never know just what you mean to me
And you never could as far as I can see
If we don't know where we're going next how could we ever say
If it could ever last or if it fades away
So I tell you once again
That maybe you'd better get for away from me as you can
I'm sorry that I can't be what everybody needs from me
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